Life Uncrustable

“Will you cut the crust off?”

This is what my daughter asks for as she and I lay in her bed discussing what I’ll pack in her lunch for the day… a ham and cheese sandwich minus the crust.  Isn’t that what we all want sometimes though? Life with no crust.

Parents do this all the time; it’s like a key to childhood, a rite of passage, taking the extra time to cut off the crust of a child’s sandwich.  This tiny gesture, it’s like making a sandwich with extra love packed inside, making it easier to eat and yet, when you remove the crust, the sandwich appears so much smaller in size, more compact somehow. Which made me wonder, just what did I remove?

According to a German study, when bread is baked, there is a chemical reaction that occurs in the dough that places more antioxidants in the crust. It also contains more fiber than the softer middle part which gives you added benefits to prevent colon cancer.  So, perhaps my act of love isn’t providing her with any medical favors, but nowhere in that study does it state how much crust one person would have to consume to make a marked difference.

If life were a sandwich and all the rough moments were your crust: all the meetings that you had to attend, the errands you had to run, or the older kids who tore up your hat and stole your shoes that you had to endure at day camp. All of these little crusty moments give you building blocks to character, make you strong, and help you fight off the bigger things when they pop up.  With the crust on, your day seems bigger than it really is and just because there are benefits to eating the crust, sometimes you have to know when to have the “crust cut off”.

There are times when I make her a sandwich and she eats the whole thing, crust and all, but I guess she knew today needed to be a “no crust” day and, this morning, I cut off all the crusts and packed a few kit kat bars for extra measure.   There are days when I go to work and I don’t have a single meeting scheduled, making it easier to get other stuff done, kinda like having a day with the crust cut off.

Make a Choice

Newton's Three Laws of Motion

1. A body in rest tends to stay at rest, and a body in motion tends to stay in motion, unless the body is compelled to change its state. The evidence supporting the first part of this statement is easily seen. We know that a wheel will not begin rolling by itself. However, we do not see the proof of the second half in our world. That is because there is an ever present inhibiting force known as friction that acts as the external force resisting perpetual motion.

2. The second law is a formula--- Acceleration=Force/mass. The acceleration of a body is dependent upon both the mass of the object (not its weight) and the net force perpetuating the motion (total force in the direction of the motion minus the force resisting motion). In the formula, a resisting force would be written as negative to produce a negative acceleration, which means the object would be slowing down.

3. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. This means that if I push you, I myself will be slightly pushed back in the process. This is the principle at work behind how jet planes and rockets propel themselves. They expel gases in the opposite direction, are pushed themselves in the process, and thus move forward.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I’ve never made it a secret that I’m not a hugely political person.  I’m not a member of any particular political party and I prefer it that way.  I’m an individualist and what works for me in my life doesn’t work for everyone else, but I appreciate our differences and so we go on.  In the grand scheme of things, these men and women in political offices are only human beings looking for employment and you can either grant them the ability to do things for you or not.  They are your vesicles towards getting things done and in four more years, we’ll roll the dice again and see what our options are.  Until then, take a moment to either morn or celebrate your candidate, take a deep breath and let’s all move on, shall we?

By nature, we're not meant to be still, stationary, never moving forward.  Time never stands still and I don't think we should either.  Newton states that a body in motion tends to stay in motion and I believe that a mind that’s actively seeking enlightenment will continue to be enlightened by the world surrounding it.  Just because the polls are closed and the votes have been counted, doesn’t mean that you can sit around and tune out; the next challenge in the game has just begun and we need active players.  Your next goal?  Find happiness within the world that you live in.

I know this sounds ominous, but it’s not.  Do you like where you are? If not, find out what you need to change it and make a choice.  Do you like who you’re with?  If not, find out what you need to change it and make a choice.  Do you like what you do?  If not, find out what you need to change it and make a choice.  Do you see what I’m doing there?  You had that power before the elections and you still have that power now; the most powerful thing you can ever do in your life is “make a choice”

Let’s think about this in terms of Newton’s second law; Acceleration=Force/mass.  If everyone continued to stay in motion and started making choices for themselves instead of letting whoever was elected into office do it for them, think of the mass of people that would inspire.  The thing I noticed most during this political cycle is that everyone thinks they know what’s best for everyone else, and they do this unintentionally because they assume they are voting for someone who’s making decisions for the masses.  However, the force that would be generated by the masses if they would start making choices for themselves instead of their neighbors would be enormous.  This force would then propel those people that we give that political power to make choices that make more sense, no matter who they are or what party they belong to.

The simple act of electing someone to an office, does not make them a god, they are not all knowing or all seeing.  They have no idea what’s going on around them and most of the information they get is worthless because it’s all noise.  Do you know what cuts through the noise?  Action.  Nike has the right idea when they say “Just do it”.  What choices are you making that create action?  Sitting around complaining to someone does not always create action unless you’re complaining to the right people.  Most often you’re going to have to get up and do something.  I don’t care what anyone’s slogan was, no political candidate will ever move a nation anywhere unless he inspires them to action.

Now, from all of Newton’s laws, his third law may be the most important; for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.  You need to understand this best of all because nothing worth having ever came without a fight.  Every choice you make in life, especially the ones you make for yourself will be met with resistance and skepticism.  The universe does this for good reason; it’s to make sure the choice you’re making is the right choice for you.  You need to know why you’re making the choices you are and in the process it will make you stronger and more willing to make even harder choices in the future.  Fight for yourself, never rely on someone else to do it for you.

I’m aware that some of you don’t have the slightest clue who I am and to be honest, it’s not even important, but today I’m pushing you.  For the last year, I have watched the masses push each other towards a political agenda, but today the focus is back on you.  So I’m pushing you to make a choice.  Make a choice that’s solely for you.  Make a choice that makes you happy.  Make a choice about your future.  Make a choice about what you’re going to have for lunch today.  Make a choice.  Make a choice.  Make a choice that helps you move forward and when everyone’s moving forward the nation will move forward too.  By nature, we are not meant to be still, stationary, never moving forward.

Make a choice that moves YOU forward.

The Keys to Happiness

Happiness.  If you ask a child what they think happiness is, they’ll probably describe places they like or candy they enjoy or people they have fun with.  Happiness to children is dramatic and thrilling because it’s likely the first time they’ve ever experienced that feeling, at that time, doing that activity.  For adults, it’s a little more complicated, but could that be caused by our perception of what it means to be happy?

Thomas Bodett theorized that a person only needs three things to truly be happy: Something to do, someone to love, and something to look forward to.  However, while I did my happiness research it made me wonder if that was really as clear as it should be.  I’m a mom with two small children, I’m never without something to do, but I’m not so sure that helping my son complete his second grade homework makes either of us happy.  I have family and friends, so I have plenty of people to love, but there are moments when I can’t stand them, and a few that hurt my heart to love them. That’s not happiness.  Then there’s that something to look forward to thing, should it be big or small?  What if it never happens?  I’m looking forward to winning the lottery, but the likelihood of that happening is pretty slim.  It gets a little difficult to find happiness when your chances of success are few. 

That’s when I decided to look up the definition of happiness, where I found the expected phrases like joy, pleasure, and good fortune, but there was one expression that made me take pause, contentment.  To be content in something is to really only be satisfied, it’s not an overwhelming sense of joy, or a state of blissful delight, it’s just the satisfaction of a life lived.  If we look at this with new eyes, let’s restate our question: How do we live a satisfied life?

To be satisfied, I believe people need four elements in their everyday tasks:

• Satisfying work
• Hope of success
• Social connections and interactions
• Meaning or purpose

Let’s go over each to give them more focus.

More satisfying work is accomplished by doing two things: creating a clear mission with actionable next steps.  Take for example the production issue that was brought to my team yesterday.  One of our users discovered that one of our data feeds had been loading bad data into our application.  At first glance, it’s a problem because we’ve been made aware of our mission – correct the data – but we don’t have any idea how to solve it – lack of actionable next steps.  At that point, I told my co-worker that we should make our first mission not the problem, but to convert this problem into work.

Mission – create work from problem

Actionable steps –

Investigation code for cause

Investigation data for impacts

Investigation options for resolution

From there, each of those steps can generate work with additional steps until a resolution is achieved.  The satisfaction comes from seeing the steps you completed during your journey.

Still looking at my work from yesterday, there is a level of hope for success in each task because we knew it could be fixed.  Did I know how to fix every piece?  Certainly not, data is not my thing, I can’t seem to visualize it, and when I’m forced to take on SQL it just makes me dizzy.  Hope of success for me on that step is simply overwhelming, but I do know a few other team members who don’t have that same challenge that I do, so I’ll tackle the items I can and ask for help on the parts that I can’t, then find satisfaction in the success of the whole team.

Which brings us to social connections and interactions; in the words of Tina Turner “What’s love got to do with it?”  Nothing.  I value and respect my co-workers. They are helpful and I look to them for guidance, or inspiration, but not love.  I have a few acquaintances that I find entertaining or inspiring and I enjoy their company, but I don’t love them.  There are reasons why services such as Facebook and Twitter exist, people need that ability to reach out and connect with the human experience, even if that connection is passive.  Social connections let us know we are not alone, whether our experiences are positive or negative they are all a part of being human, and I find satisfaction in that not all of my experiences are unique and there are people around to help me when I need it.

Which bring us to my final point: Meaning.  What’s the point of doing anything in life if it doesn’t mean anything?  If the bad data was not affecting anything and no one was reviewing it anyway, what’s the point of fixing it?  This is part of creating meaning or purpose to your actions.  Few people create a blog in the hopes that no one will ever read it, deep down they have a desire to reach out to someone and hopeful help that person in a positive way.  The single best way to add meaning to anything is to connect our actions to something that is bigger than ourselves.  We need to know that as astronauts on this speck of rock that we ride around on in the middle of our galaxy, that what we do is important to the greater good, has value, and is worthy of not only our time but others’ time as well.  I find satisfaction in knowing that someone is using that data I fixed to help the company recover funds, which in turn help pay me and my co-workers.  My actions have meaning.

Writer, Elizabeth Gilbert, states it best “Happiness is the consequence of personal effort… You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings.”  Don’t set out to find happiness, find contentment and happiness will find you. 

What are your “sticky little leaves”?

As I stand on the door step to spring, awaiting the predictions of a groundhog, I’m reminded of a quote by an 1880’s Russian author, whose name I cannot pronounce, “I have a longing for life, and I go on living in spite of logic. Though I may not believe in the order of the universe, yet I love the sticky little leaves as they open in spring.” For this particular character, the sticky little leaves are one of the few things in the world that give him hope even when the world around him seems hopeless because they endure. They’re his reminder to love life in spite of its meaning or purpose and live a life worth living. Now, I’m quite certain that to really drink in life meant something entirely different in Russia during the 1880’s, so I thought I would share with you six of my “sticky little leaves”.

My first “sticky little leaf” is my ability to create. I write, I paint, I play more than one instrument, I crochet, I sew, I dream. I have clones. It’s no happy accident that I’m a crafter or a mother or even that I became a computer programmer. By creating it gives me hope that I can create the life I want to live and I don’t have to settle.

My second “sticky little leaf” is my ability to relate to people. Sometimes I blame it on the fact that I’m an Aquarius, but I’m sure that has nothing at all to do with it. I’m a social creature and I love being around people. I love to hear what they think, how they feel, and what they’re doing. I love to hear what they’re passionate about, even if I don't believe in it. I love the way they inspire me. My relationships give me hope that I’m never really alone unless I choose to be.

My third “sticky little leaf” is my ability to help. I’m not wealthy, nor do I have tons of time, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be helpful. I help my co-workers with projects or solutions, when I can. I help my friends laugh a little, when I can. And every night, though it may seem trivial, I help my children with their homework, when I can. Even by helping with something small it gives me hope that I have something worth passing on.

My forth “sticky little leaf” is my ability to realize goals. This has not always been an easy thing for me to do, since I often get caught up in the details of accomplishing something. However, when I do reach a milestone, something that’s been especially challenging, it gives me hope that future goals are attainable, even if I have to ask for help.

My fifth “sticky little leaf” is my ability to play. At times, I have an imagination that’s as big as the universe. I love to visualize things and imagine what’s possible even if only to see how far I can take it. By playing with a thought or having fun with something mundane, gives me hope that not everything has only one purpose and you can’t see its full potential until you play.

My sixth and last “sticky little leaf” is my ability to grow. In college, one of my professors told us, “The most important thing you’ll ever learn is to learn to love to learn.” The world around us has so many lessons, we just have to be willing to accept what it’s teaching. I’m constantly looking for something to learn, be it something new or an expansion of something I already know. By growing, I remain hopeful that even as the world changes, I’ll be able to stay flexible and adapt.

To create, to relate, to help, to realize, to play, and to grow are what make my life worth living, giving me hope in times of chaos, and the desire to drink in life. Spring, itself, is a renewal of sorts, a chance to brush off the cold of winter, turn your face to the warmth of the sun, and begin again with something hopeful. Even Samuel Coleridge wrote, “Winter slumbering in the open air, wears on his smiling face a dream... of spring.“

So I ask, What are your “sticky little leaves”?

How to be Evil

Note: This was a speech I gave to my toastmasters club today. It was fun and non-work related and everyone loved it so much that they wanted to see the words, so I thought I'd post them here. I hope you enjoy. :)

~~~@@@~~~~

Welcome and Thank you for your interest in joining the Forces of Darkness.

Whether you’re here out of pure curiosity or this has been a life long dream, I’m quite certain that the steps presented today will assist you in creating a successful and lucrative evil empire.

By definition, Evil is simply the propensity for mischief or thereby exhibiting bad moral qualities. However, evil is so much more than that.

For those still sitting on the fence, let’s review the many reason why evil may be the path for you.

By choosing the ways of Evil over good you will inherit an unbelievable amount of power and unlimited wealth which you will then be able to utilize in the destruction of your enemies or deliver misery to millions without any of that pesky residual guilt or remorse. Other optional benefits to look forward to are mind control, superpowers, control of the undead, or even immortality.

You’ll need several things to get started, so let’s begin with your name. Selecting a name is important since the mere mention of it should strike fear in the hearts of anyone within earshot. If you have any distinguishing characteristics, your name could be descriptive. For example, if your skin is made of sand, Sandman fits quite nicely. If you’re in a bit of a hurry and aren’t very picky, you could go with a sinister name, which is typically made up of a title, first name, and last name, such as Lord Blood Spawn. Of course, your name doesn’t have to be flashy and sometime the name you were give at birth is enough to make the masses tremble, such as Bill Gates or Walt Disney.

Next, you’ll need a motive. The most common of these is the desire for power, that ability to do anything and be held accountable for nothing, is what keeps this motive at the top of the list. Other very popular motives include Hate, Greed, Madness, and Revenge. Of course, some are simply born Evil and have never considered any other way. But for a very small percentage, the only thing that stands between a child and a life-long career of evil, is the love of a parent thereby diverting those young minds from the path of darkness. Damn them!

Now, since you never get a second chance to make a first impression, you’ll want to take extra care in how you present yourself to the public. Classic Black is always a good option, since it’s easy to match and it hides dirt very well. If you find black too Goth for you, you might decide to go the way of the business suit since in today’s society only the truly evil wear them. The Gadgety Supervillain costume is another option, but with spandex quickly going out of style carries it’s own risks. Since the advances in modern science, an increasingly popular option is the ability to transfer your intelligence into a computer or even another human being, giving you the ability to be anywhere at anytime. But the best option by far may be to never reveal your face at all. This option allows you to mingle among the masses, disguise yourself as one of them, and witness your evil deeds first-hand.

Finally, no evil-doer would be complete without an evil laugh. Whether it’s a Bwahahaha or a heh-heh-heh-heh you’ll want to be comfortable with it so use it often. Practice, practice, practice.

Once you’ve clearly defined your Evil identity, you may be wondering what sort of careers are available. The options of criminal mastermind and Corporate Bastard are very closely related. Both require hard work, climbing up the ladder by killing off your enemies and scores of henchmen. If your not really looking for a challenge in your evil career, you might find Necromancer or Avatar for a God or Demon more to your liking. Both of these career choices involve possession and command of the undead, which are great since they won’t put up much of a fight. This final evil career may be the very worst of them all since they are hated by the good and evil alike, but if you don’t mind being alone the career of Spammer or Telemarketer may just be your dream job.

Now that you’ve discovered what you were always meant to do, the only way to insure that you’ll get everything accomplished, is to hire henchmen. Mindless, drones to carry out all the dirty tasks you shouldn’t have to do as the brains of the operation. So what options do I have in henchmen? I’m so glad you asked. Classic Thugs are a tradition of evil-doers everywhere. They are muscle when needed, never question the task, and are very easy to come by. The corporate suits are great for that corporate take over, but be weary of these minions, they may be after your job, so dispose of them when no longer needed. Mutant Race, the undead, and Supernatural Creatures are great for those who enjoy dabbling in those things that go against nature. However, the behavior of these minions can be unpredictable, so proceed with caution. And finally, not available until just recently, The Computer programmer. This new type of henchmen can help you navigate and control the information superhighway and he who control information controls the world, or so I’ve heard.

I know that the information I have given you today will only get you started on the path to evil greatness. To further your evil career you may will want to visit the following website to define your evil goals and objectives and set your ultimate plan in motion. Thank you for your time and good luck in your evil endeavors.

Complete your evil plan - http://www.darksites.com/evilplan.php

Adjust and Move Forward

Lewis: I don't even know what I'm doing.
Wilbur: Keep moving forward.
Lewis: I mean, this stuff is way too advanced for me.
Wilbur: Keep moving forward.
Lewis: And what if I can't fix this, what are we going to do?
Wilbur: Keep moving forward.
Lewis: Why do you keep saying that? And don't just say keep moving forward!
Wilbur: It's my dad's motto.
Lewis: Why would his motto be keep moving forward?
Wilbur: It's what he does.

~ Meet the Robinsons (2007) ~

It’s so incredibly easy to take the people in your life for granted, the things they do and say, the support they provide even when you don’t realize they’re doing it. But when they go, that’s when you notice; that’s when you wish you could go back and change things or just spend more time with them, except that’s not how we’re meant to experience the world. Like it or not things change, time moves on and you must make the decision, here and now, on how you will move forward with it.

I’ve had the same job for 14 years, and during that time I’ve seen quite a few of my co-workers come and go. Today, however, I said goodbye to a woman who has sat in the cube on the other side of the wall from me for nearly half the time I’ve worked here. Her job was eliminated and she is moving on. Today was her last day.

She was what I would call a work friend, one of those glorious people you share your day with, but you don’t often see after 5pm. Nevertheless, she’s seen me through the birth of both my children, watched them grow, and anytime I bring them to work, they always look forward to visiting with her. I’ve heard the stories of her son’s tour of duty in Iraq and the arrival of each one or her grandchildren. We’ve complained about our jobs together, weathered the storm of each merger that crossed our paths, and helped each other on tasks in the off chance we needed it. We didn’t work directly on the same team, but when you’ve worked with someone in the same place for that long, it really doesn’t matter.

I asked her, this morning, what she planned to do with her time now that she won’t have to get up at the crack of dawn. Her answer was that she wasn’t sure, but truly believed that everything happens for a reason, and until that reason makes itself known, she has lots and lots of books she’s been meaning to read. Since this is a belief I hold also, I hope the reason is one that brings her and her family tons and tons of joy.

I guess it would have been nice to spend more time with her, but change isn’t always something you can control, so you focus on the things you can control, the way in which you keep moving forward. And this theme from Disney’s “Meet the Robinsons” has always been an inspiration for me. The difference is that Lewis got to go into the future and see the wonderful things that would happen to him, but all those wonderful things wouldn’t have happened if he’d managed to successfully change all the regretful things from his past. So, I will miss my friend, and I may not be able to visit my future to guarantee that she will remain in my life, but I’m ever hopeful that our friendship will continue to keep moving forward.

Now I wonder, would you ultimately want to sacrifice your future, just to change something about your past? Or what decision, in this exact moment, will you make to keep moving forward?

Where are you today?

I can tell you where I'm not; I'm not sitting at this desk in my very dull cubicle in the building in which I work. Oh sure, my body might be there, but me? I'm no where near. You may wonder how that's possible, but if you really think about it, I'm sure you can figure it out.

So far, I've been wandering the grocery trying to decide what items we need at home. School's starting soon and I'll have two attending this year. Oh and the school supplies!! I guess I'll be going somewhere to get those too. Dang it, Mommy duty is just never done!

But once I've escaped from that, I'll travel to the UK and browse the latest sale items at one of my favorite retailers. I must tell you, they have the most gorgeous items, but I'd never have anywhere to wear any of it. Perhaps, I'll browse the events section of the newspaper later to find anything I can dress up for, even if I'm the only one who will really enjoy it.

And when I'm done window shopping, I'll hang out at my latest discovered vacation spot, a little cabin by the lake witnessing two people fall in love, summer after summer. Yes, it's true, that I'm only a voyeur in these situations, but they'll never even know I'm here and I'm not the only one watching, there are others. Oh, goodness! Before anyone freaks out, I'm only listening to a story. -rolls eyes-

So, I may not have any gas in the car right now and I'll have to pickup the clones before 6pm, but that doesn't have to mean I'm stuck in a cage. I'll still get stuff done and do what they pay me for, but if my mind doesn't have to be here, I can just about guarantee it won't be.

So I'm curious, Where are you today?